Sermons

Minister: Rev. Margaret A. Beckman

“It’s hard to know when to respond to the seductiveness of the world and when to respond to its challenge. If the world were merely seductive, that would be easy. If it were merely challenging, that would be no problem. But I arise in the morning torn between the desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.”
—E.B. White
READING
“Held” by Bill Neely in With or Without Candlelight, A Skinner House Books Meditation Anthology, edited by Victoria Safford. Boston. 2009.

HELD by Bill Neely

The brown box was heavily taped,
safe for shipping far away,
Happy Birthday shakily written
in black magic marker on top.

He shuffled to the counter,
box gingerly in hand,
he slowly set it down,
and lifted up his worn, warm eyes.

She was rushed.
Long lines. Slow hours.
Impatient crowd. Tax time.
Next.
Next.
Next.
She had just tossed a package in a bin,
and had turned toward him ready to repeat.

She saw age in his eyes,
tremors in his hands,
love in his box,
joy in his gift.
Happy Birthday.

She slowed, asked, Is it fragile?
No, it’s a doll for my granddaughter.
What color?
Pink. For her, always pink.
I bet it’s pretty.
I hope she likes it. She’s a little old.
I’m sure she will. Girls always love dolls.

She smoothed the postage on top,
away from Happy Birthday,
gingerly carried it to a bin,
and softly set it down.

She held his gift with tender hands,
while we waited and watched,
wishing to be held in the same,
wanting to hold in the same.

READING
The Book of Joy, Lasting Happiness in a Changing World. His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu with Douglas Abrams. New York: Avery, an imprint of Penguin Random House, 2016.

“We are fragile creatures, and it is from this weakness, not despite it, that we discover the possibility of true joy.” DT p.11

“Discovering more joy does not, I’m sorry to say, save us from the inevitability of hardship and heartbreak. In fact, we may cry more easily, but we will laugh more easily too. Perhaps we are just more alive. Yet as we discover more joy, we can face suffering in a way that ennobles rather than embitters. We have hardship without becoming hard. We have heartbreak without being broken.” DT p.12 SERMON

Ubuntu. I am because of you.
Namaste. I bow to you.

Ubuntu is an African term meaning “humanity”. It is often translated as “I am because we are,” and also “humanity towards others”, but is often used in a more philosophical sense to mean “the belief in a universal bond of sharing that connects all humanity”.

Namaste comes from India. It is both a greeting and the spiritual concept of the universal divine spark.

Sometimes rendered as The divine in me sees the divine in you.

Words from different languages, cultures and spiritual traditions. Both Ubuntu and Namaste are greetings and much more. A deep respect for the other is part of the gesture. And within these greeting lies the whole of humanity and our utter interdependence.

When I greet you, I am wanting to share ubuntu and namaste. If I can do this on a consistent basis and really, truly live into the fullness of our interconnection, with all of humanity, with all of the web of existence, then I would be more like Archbishop Desmond Tutu and His Holiness the Dalai Lama. But, I fall far short of their standard. And so, I turn to them for their lived wisdom.

The timeless question that Archbishop Tutu and the Dalai Lama set about to answer is this: “How can we find lasting joy in the face of life’s inevitable suffering?” We seek to discover the relationship between joy and suffering – not only in terms of our personal experience, but also in a world that seems bent on destruction.

One woman posed her question this way: The world is in such turmoil – war, starvation, terrorism, pollution, genocide. My heart hurts for these issues. How do I find joy in the midst of such large world problems?

The Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu spent three days together discussing joy – what is joy, what prevents us from having joy and, finally, what might we do to cultivate joy in our lives. The Book of Joy, Lasting Happiness in a Changing World is the result.

There is so much in this book that I am finding helpful. It’s an easy and uplifting read. I invite you to set aside the books on politics and cultural divides and give your monthly issues of The Atlantic or Harpers a rest. Take up this book and settle into a comfortable place with your favorite beverage and spend a few hours with two of our most effective spiritual leaders.

This is important to me because I will tell you, and some of you may agree, that we, that I, lose happiness and well-being when confronted with the magnitude of the sheer, and often intentional, meanness in our world.

Now, I understand that there will be earthquakes, volcanoes, hurricanes, and wildfires and that life, human life and other life, will suffer when such events occur. I can somehow put these events of the cycles of earth life in a perspective that is neither good nor evil. Life is both beautiful and terrible in this way. When natural disaster strikes, people rush in to help. We are full of compassion. The timeless question, I think, has more to do with the suffering that comes as a result of human actions.

I’m not going to give you a litany of the mean things going on in our world because we would be here past the end of coffee hour and each of you has a running tabulation of humanity’s worst behaviors in your own mind anyway. The news is full of another installment of the ways in which governments and leaders and neighbors inflict great harm and suffering on others for their own gain. How can I find lasting joy in the face of the terrible things we do to each other and to Earth?

Archbishop Desmond Tutu offers the observation that it is in our human fragility that we discover the possibility of joy, but it isn’t all peaches and cream. As he says, “Discovering more joy does not, I’m sorry to say, save us from the inevitability of hardship and heartbreak. In fact, we may cry more easily, but we will laugh more easily too. Perhaps we are just more alive. Yet as we discover more joy, we can face suffering in a way that ennobles rather than embitters. We have hardship without becoming hard. We have heartbreak without being broken.”

The Dalai Lama says “One great question underlies our existence. What is the purpose of life? After much consideration, I believe that the purpose of life is to find happiness.” He also says that the source of happiness is within us. Outward attainment will not bring real inner joyfulness. We must look inside for that.

I want to share with you something else the Dalai Lama says that, upon reflection, is completely obvious, yet when I first read it, I was blown away.

This is a long quote, so stick with me here . . .
“Now we are in the twenty-first century. We are improving on the innovations of the twentieth century and continuing to improve our material world. While of course there are still a lot of poor people who do not have adequate food, generally the world is now highly developed. The problem is that our world and our education remain focused exclusively on external, materialistic values. Those who grow up with this kind of education live a materialistic life and eventually the whole society becomes materialistic. But this culture is not sufficient to tackle our human problems. The real problem is here,” the Dalai Lama said, pointing to his head.

The Archbishop, in agreement and response, tapped his chest with his fingers to emphasize the heart as well.

“And here,” the Dalia Lama echoed. “Mind and heart. Materialistic values cannot give us peace of mind. So we really need to focus on our inner values, our true humanity.” DL pp. 29-30
A greater concern for the well-being of others is needed. This is an inner value. It has nothing to do with financial or academic success. We have moved into a place where success, and happiness, are measured in all the wrong ways. A person’s value in this culture has more to do with her net worth than it does with her love for her neighbor. Yet, it is love for our neighbors that brings us joy.

Our greatest joy is discovered when we seek to do good for others. Both Archbishop Tutu and the Dalai Lama agree that people are basically good. We are wired to be compassionate. We are demonstrating more compassion as a species. Archbishop Tutu presses this point directly and he says that we can find joy in the growing compassion of humanity as a whole. Yes, on any given day, even during any given governing administration, we may experience setbacks and horrible things may take place. But, on the whole over the course of history, he is convinced that we are gaining in our capacity and willingness to be compassionate.

In finding joy, it is important to understand what prevents joy. These two spiritual leaders discussed at some length the obstacles to joy which include the following list.1

OBSTACLES TO JOY

Fear, Stress, and Anxiety
The Archbishop said that anxiety and fear are two mechanisms which help people survive.
Shouting Releases Frustration and Anger
Dalai Lama believed that fear and frustration are interconnected. When fear is present, frustration comes next. When there is frustration, anger creeps in.
Sadness and Grief Bind People
Archbishop Tutu shared his experience when he chaired the Truth and Reconciliation Commission.
Despair
How can people live their life with joy in this world beset with pollution, starvation, poverty, war, terrorism, genocide, and other depressing issues?
Loneliness
Many people tend to be lonely despite the advent of modern technology which brings social media connection.
Envy
It is a destructive feeling once you let it stay in your heart. Dalai Lama pointed out that comparison is a concept that people usually use to see how far he is in the competition. However, when it becomes a pattern and it happens whenever you relate to others, it can cause great suffering.
Suffering and Adversity
Behind adversity is an unseen benefit which can bring positive opportunities. Dalai Lama said that tragic situations teach lessons and provide opportunities.
Sickness and Death
Nobody is exempted. People become sick and they die when their time on earth expires. This is a fact and nothing can change that course of life.

In finding joy, it is important to understand what practices cultivate and encourage joy. They offer for our consideration the eight pillars of joy. The first four are matters of the mind and the second four are matters of the heart.

EIGHT PILLARS OF JOY

Four are of the MIND
#1 Perspective
Dalai Lama said that since the beginning, humans have the capacity to create their own sufferings. This ability can also be used to create joy and transform their lives.

#2 Humility
Humility is a virtue which is essential to attain joy. When you have a wider perspective, you see yourself as part of the whole

#3 Humor
Everyone knows the famous cliché that Even Dalai Lama and Archbishop
Tutu knew the benefits of laughter and humor in their own lives.

#4 Acceptance
Dalai Lama’s ability to accept his situation without becoming morose when he was exiled was astounding. He learned to accept that it was part of his journey to become a better teacher, preacher, and spiritual leader.

FOUR are of the HEART
#5 Forgiveness
The heart is the core of life. It pumps to keep you alive.
It produces feelings which make you human. The heart is the reservoir of different emotions positive and negative. It sends direct messages to your mind and
influences your thoughts and actions.

#6 Gratitude
Being grateful for everyday blessings is complimenting God for His divine creations and interventions.

#7 Compassion
The seventh pillar of joy is compassion. It is a genuine instinct that can be cultivated and developed as people grow spiritually.

#8 Generosity
Joy is like a perfume. When you spray it to someone, you smell its fragrance.

I suspect you know something about both the obstacles to joy and the pillars of joy. The tricky part is letting go of the obstacles – many of which are deeply ingrained in us despite their lack of lasting benefits – and taking time to practice until habitual the pillars of joy.

Enough about what joy is and how we find it.

My deep question is “Why do we need to find lasting joy?”
And the answer is alarmingly simple and two-fold.
First – so that we can be useful to the world.
Second – so that we might not fall victim to immobilizing despair in the presence of injustice and suffering.

This makes sense to me. Joy begets joy. Joy overcomes suffering.
We need to be strong and centered within ourselves, as the Dalai Lama says, full of inner joy and possessed of inner values, in order to be of use to the world in confronting injustice and inequality. We cannot respond with compassion if we have no inner strength, peace, and joy.

Douglas Abrams is the co-author of The Book of Joy along with Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama. He convened the conversations and asked guiding questions of the two spiritual leaders throughout their three days together. He offers this observation . . .
Still some might wonder what our own joy has to do with countering injustice and inequality. What does our happiness have to do with addressing the suffering of the world? In short, the more we heal our own pain, the more we can turn to the pain of others. But in a surprising way, what the Archbishop and the Dalai Lama were saying is that the way to heal our own pain is actually by turning to the pain of others. It is a virtuous cycle. The more we turn toward others, the more joy we experience, and the more joy we experience, the more joy we can bring to others. The goal is not just to create joy for ourselves but, as the Archbishop poetically phrased it, “to be a reservoir of joy, an oasis of peace, a pool of serenity that can ripple out to all those around you.” . . . joy is in fact quite contagious. As is love, compassion, and generosity. P.63
Whatever joy I can gather within myself begins to move outward from within me toward others to increase the happiness and peace in the world.
That works for me. Perhaps it will work for you as well.

Here are the three take-aways from The Book of Joy that I offer you in closing.

We find more joy by expecting to find joy and by noticing joy when it comes to us; and by intentionally practicing the eight pillars that increase joy.
Our world encourages us to find meaning and success in materialistic measures. This is a failure of spirit. We need to focus on and cultivate inner values that lead to compassion for ourselves and for others.
This world is filled with injustice and inequality that result from human failures of the heart and the lack of African ubuntu and Indian namaste. My own life will have both hardship and heartache. If I am to have any chance at all of surviving my own suffering and of being part of the solution to the world’s injustice, I need to be strong and centered and at peace within my spirit. I need to maintain my own reservoir of joy so that I can freely give love, generosity, compassion and joy in my work for justice and in my interactions with each person I meet along the way.

My dear Spiritual Companions, may you find lasting joy in your lives sufficient to carry you through all the ups and downs of this adventure we call life. May you know that you are filled with the light of divine love and may you share that light wherever there is a need. Together, may we all practice the religion of compassion and joy.

Blessed Be. I Love You. Amen.

 

1. This list of Obstacles and the Pillars is taken from the Two-Page summary of The Book of Joy published by Readtrepreneur, Copyright 2017.