Sermons

This month the Soul Matters liturgical calendar directed us to the theme of beauty. Beauty is such a broad and exciting topic. And after conducting Spring themed services that focused on beauty of seasonal changes and nature I pondered “what is being left out of this aesthetic discussion”? It was a roundabout way in which it became clear to me that what was missing was not more about physical beauty. No; Rather than zeroing in on external beauty i wondered about manifestation of individual human beauty; inner beauty,
Now when I say inner beauty, what I am focusing on is the presence of “pleasing psychological factors [like] …personality, intelligence, grace, politeness, charisma, integrity, congruence and elegance,” (Wikipedia) I would further add kindness and compassion.
Simply put these beauty characteristics are the qualities that might identify one as being a "good person". A good person; a beautiful soul.
This kind of beauty is not typically that which you take a picture of, and It’s not (likely) featured on the front cover of a fashion magazine. Even on social media this beauty is often lost to the more salacious click bait posts that operate like tabloid pieces. And further, this beauty is usually not chasing the spotlight, but rather doing the opposite; In humility not wanting a beacon on themselves. Thus inner beauty is practically invisible to our human gaze. And yet, if we look not with our eyes but with our hearts such beauty is jaw dropping, and impossible to miss.

When I begin thinking on the concept of inner beauty a particular salient poem comes to mind. The poem is “Phenomenal Woman”, by the writer Maya Angelou, and in part it states,

“Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me…”

This compression of womanhood and moreover expression of beauty in poetic verse gives us a glimpse of the possibilities of how beauty—outer and inner can be perceived. The main importance of beauty here is not how visually aesthetic a person is, but rather it is in personality, it is in the manifestation of these qualities in the being.
I was not exposed to this poem by Maya Angelou until in my teen years. But I wish the words or the message had in some way been directed toward me earlier. As a child-- slightly older-- but not far from the age of my daughter I experienced bullying for physical characteristics that set me apart from many of my peers. I was harassed at school for my darker complexion, tightly curled hair texture and style, and early physical maturity. Up to this age I was a confident, outgoing kid. I had a mind of my own and no problem sharing my thoughts or ideas. And that all changed out of this experience. Here began my questioning of self as a preteen. I began judging myself, in addition to erecting emotional walls to protect myself from future harassment.
Neither then nor now am I alone in this experience of self criticism. Like others, from such trying difficult life experience I carry residual scars. These scars, like all scars do act as protective barrier for a wound. Out of the scarring, in addition to a protective layer, exist lasting damage to one’s perception of oneself. And thus many people every day doubt themselves, and are moreover critical of their person, undervaluing and/or not seeing the beauty in their own being.

Often we talk about this in the context of helping people uplift self-esteem. But I assert this is an issue bigger than "self esteem", but rather considerations of self worth [-- valuing oneself as a human being.]
As Unitarian Universalists our first principle is of “The inherent worth and dignity of every person”. This principle is what first pulled me into this faith. It made sense to me, as someone who had struggled with other faiths in their exclusion of various identities, and associated judgement and devaluing of such individuals. I am appreciative of the value we as UUs place on such a principle. I herald it in advocating for my siblings. //And while I know I am not alone in this regard, I also consider:
How often do we then direct this principle into the mirror, do we direct it toward ourselves?; seeing and valuing the inherent worth and dignity In our own persons? When do we recognize and appreciate our own beauty?

At times our feelings of self worth may falter, may be challenged by life and circumstance, may be reminded of the scars we wear. Our feeling of self worth may become depleted. We may believe we are not worthy, not deserving.
Alas, appreciate, love yourself, openly; it is needed, it is necessary. Appreciation for one's own beauty may seen self centered, and counter to what a good, person with inner beauty would aim to do. Realization of self-worth is the thing in need of restoration and self worth itself is the very salve needed to do so! We all have it, the inherent worth and dignity, the capacity for this beauty. Recognition of our own exemplification of inner beauty may contribute to feeling empowerment, growth and strength, in recognition of our own inherent worth and dignity, in line with our Unitarian Universalist values.

As my daughter nears the age I was when I was bullied I reflect also on the changes she and children her age are experiencing socially as they near adolescence. Concerns over one’s own looks and body image become a pressing norm. I contemplate this and she is young enough still for children's stories to be the harbingers of salient messages and morals; in this light I think of the children’s stories and fairy tales that highlight beauty, and more vitally inner beauty.
I searched through the children's library for a Time for All Ages, but the story I first had in mind was unavailable. Nonetheless, I feel it important to at least summarize the story and it's importance for even our adult understandings.
The story in mind is the original telling of what most may be familiar with as a Walt Disney classic, but the tale goes back to the 1700s. This is, La Belle et la Bête (more commonly known in retelling as Beauty and the Beast.) The story has been told and retold and been made more kid friendly over the years of its incorporation to our popular culture. But here I am interested in centering not on musical numbers, or talking dishes, but the core of the story.
The story, in short is of a young woman, Belle, who based on her father’s misfortune in traveling and bringing back a stolen rose to his daughter required to reside with a man cursed as a beast. Despite being his prisoner, the beast tends to and dotes on Belle’s every need and gifts her all her desires. Overtime, in spite of his appearance belle grows fond of him. As she wishes to visit her father, the beast asks her to marry him, to which she declines. He refuses her request, but then reconsiders. It is upon returning to visit her father, and being envied by her greedy siblings, who connive to steal from the beast, that she recognizes the beatufiul heart exhibited by the beast. Thus the spell trapping him in a hideous visage is broken, and he becomes himself, a handsome prince. The two life “happily ever after”.
//In this original telling the focus is not on any attempt to tame the beast. Rather, at the core of this and each rendering is Belle's growth and movement to care for and love the beast for his personality characteristics, notwithstanding physical appearance).
A relevant excerpt from the English translation of the story reads

“There is many a monster who wears the form of a man; it is better of the two to have the heart of a man and the form of a monster. ”
[― Jeanne-Marie Le Prince de Beaumont, Beauty and the Beast]

The lesson for Belle is here valuing that which resides within; the beast’s inner beauty, The beast’s inherent worth. Here the lesson of inherent worth is communicated in a physically beautiful figure coming to appreciate the multiple ways in which beauty can be displayed. By seeing and recognizing this inner beauty one uplifts and appreciates others’ AND ones own inherent worth. Telling of such tales paints an allegorical image that we can translate to our own lives, even in childhood and youth.

Alas, as we come to a close I leave you with these words to reflect on by The late Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh,
"To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don't need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself."

Dear ones, you are beautiful, and you are inherently worthy.
We ought uplift inner beauty regularly, without shame.
Nurture inner beauty by seeing and recognizing the existing inner beauty and worth of the self.
Here in an affirmation, take a deep breath--- in and out
Now recognize and assert, repeating after me:
“I am beautiful”

I am beautiful

“I am worthy”

“I am worthy

Recognize, know, and believe this truth.

May you each find empowerment, growth and strength in recognition of your own inherent worth and dignity, as identified with our Unitarian Universalist principles. May we each nurture our own inner beauty and in the process inspire the beauty in others.

The beauty in me, recognizes the beauty in you.
Blessed be,
Amen.